To be frank: sharing your potty preferences can be tricky

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Dear BLUNT,

My sister always complains of pain: shoulder pain, stiffness from wrist surgery that she had years ago, stuff like that. She is also quite anxious by nature. I think cannabis could really help him. I deal with similar (but not exactly the same) issues and it helps me a lot so I keep suggesting it to her, but she never seems to try it. Should I just leave him alone at this point even though I feel like I’m sitting on the perfect solution to his problems? I don’t want to be “the grass guy” or put her under pressure. – boyfriend

Hey, brother!

If you’ve told her more than once, she’s already got the message. She knows it’s something that works for you, but she has her own reasons for hesitation and she hasn’t felt comfortable sharing them.

But she also continues to complain to you.

See that she might be sharing her woes as a way to connect with you, rather than presenting you with a problem for you to solve. Start by listening to her and offering her empathy. I know how difficult it can be to patiently listen when you feel like you already have the solution. Exasperating!

But try to reproduce what your sister says in your own words and say how you imagine her feeling, for example, “Is your wrist acting again? It must be so frustrating after all the PT you’ve done. This allows her to feel heard and understood, which over time will likely reduce the number of times you will have to hear about the same issue.

The most likely way to get her to try cannabis is to share your own experience with it. You have a head start here since you are already dealing with related issues. You can tell how much a bowl has helped you relax after a hard day, but resist the urge to proselytize.

Just talk about how your day unfolded and the role cannabis played in it. Standardize cannabis for her as medicine and recreation. Chances are its resistance is linked to the long-standing social and legal stigma against cannabis, or the associated belief that being high makes you anxious and out of control. By sharing your positive experiences, you become a living testimony against Reefer Madness.

His hesitation could also stem from a lack of knowledge of pot shops and / or cannabis cultivation, and if so, you have a perfect fraternity opportunity! You can be his guide on his first visit and help him talk to budtenders and choose the right products.

Speaking of appropriate products, it wouldn’t be my column if I missed an opportunity to hook up topicals, especially since they might be perfect for your sister. Topical cannabis can provide significant relief from pain in her wrists or muscles without poisoning. Balms and lotions are the most user-friendly methods of consuming cannabis. Often times, once people try a non-intoxicating product and find that it’s not that scary, they’re more open to systemic cannabis. Topicals: the gateway drug of cannabis!

In any event..

After all of that, she just might not want to try it, and that’s her prerogative. If you build enough trust with her that she tells you why she is hesitant about cannabis, and if you talk to her about her concerns and she always says no, you have to give it up. No passing mention, no link to articles, nothing. As a brother, it’s your job to support his choices for his own health, even if that means listening to him complain a little more.


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